下面是孩子学校最近1期newsletter上开始校长的一段话,贴出了大家看看。
I recently came across “The Teen Commandments” in a publication and I would like to share it with you:
1. You shall not attempt to engage in meaningful conversation in the morning.
Don’t even bother trying to talk to your teen at breakfast or on the way to school. It will go badly, resulting in an escalation of frustration that is not healthy before 8am. Short sentences with simple instructions and very few questions are your best conversational gambit.
2. You shall not approve the use of more than two electronic devices simultaneously.
Teens can handle two devices with ease, and they will attempt to add a third to the mix. But once they go to three devices, you’ve lost all ability to attract their attention. Wild hand gestures, signal corps manoeuvres, even pleading faces will fail to penetrate their Cone of Connectivity.
3. You shall not offer commentary about haircuts, hairstyles or hair colours.
Save your judgement for piercings, tats and those giant knob things that some children insist on putting in their earlobes. Let the hair go! In the spectrum of personal grooming offences committed by teens, hair is relatively impermanent. It grows out – even if it’s dyed pink. Just check they are still within school rules!
4. You shall not offer helpful suggestions on homework management.
Don’t you know they’ve got it under control? Instead, drop small, time-orientated bombshells periodically, like “When you have that maths done, we’ll have ice cream” or “I put off dinner with grandma this weekend knowing you have a huge history project.”
5. You shall not extend curfew beyond midnight.
Nothing good happens after midnight. There is no academic, artistic or athletic event worth attending that is held after midnight.
6. You shall not expect a fully functioning frontal cortex.
New research proves that when you ask teens, “what were you thinking?” the answer “I wasn’t” is scientifically correct. As if parents needed science to prove what we’ve suspected for generations. But knowing that teens brains are still developing and accepting that teen brains are still developing are two different stages. Accept and pray.
7. You shall not believe in the chaperoning abilities of the older sibling.
The presence of an older sibling is not a guarantee for mature supervision. Chances are “Joey’s older sister” or “Tommy’s big brother” are also teenagers. Please refer to Commandment 6.
8. You shall eat dinner together as often as you can.
Early evening is about the time that teenagers appear to be most alert and animated. Take advantage of this window to discuss school, friends or college applications. And, if you need more reasons to eat together, studies suggest dinner as a family encourages kids to eat better, stay in school and refrain from drinking and drug use and lowers the risk of teen pregnancy.
9. You shall not hesitate if they call and say they need a ride home from a party.
Grab the car keys first and ask questions later. Be grateful they called you. Respond with concern and compassion so they will always call when they need you, even when they are 35.
10. You shall remember that you were 16 once.
Even if the memories of braces make you wince. Or precisely because of the memories of your own teen years make you wince. Try to summon up the empathy when they are driving you crazy. It may save you both much anguish.
Acknowledgement: The Teen Commandments by Lian Dolan, O Magazine April 21, 2010
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Good one,thanks for sharing!
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谢谢分享!
1. You shall not attempt to engage in meaningful conversation in the morning.
-- 哈哈每早只有“早,嗯, OK”等答覆:o 。
3. You shall not offer commentary about haircuts, hairstyles or hair colours.
-- 真的,一提到这个会有暴风雨 !
8. You shall eat dinner together as often as you can.-- 每晚我们全家会一
起吃晚餐。
10. You shall remember that you were 16 once. -- 想当年我在你的年级时怎样
怎样。。。以后我们要收敛些.
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顿开茅塞!
才明白每天早上车里的conversation为什么常常以不愉快而结束。呵呵,原来是没有做到知彼知己。
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很有道理,赶紧给老公看了,老公看完说,好像都是针对我说的。
今天早晨家里的对话就不一样了。
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我也刚学会这几招。
家长一学乖,青少年也变乖了
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我已经开始摸到点门路了。
对待孩子,不要居高临下,要视之为朋友,话题才会多,他们才会把想法与你分享。
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成年人更需要接受教育
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谢谢分享,很有感触.要讲究技巧和她做朋友啊.
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thanks for sharing
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