澳洲发一篇我侄女的作文---英文版

在澳大利亚小学教育



看到一个MM发了一篇很可爱的中文作文， 我突然想到我的邮箱里有很多我侄女的作文， 就捡最近的一篇贴给家里有小学生的爸爸妈妈们共享一下。侄女三年级。
有点长哦。。。还假装是个chapter的小说。


An Animal Encounter


Note from Author— This book is about my love with animals. Its genre is realistic fiction, which means that it could be real. I share my love of animals with my friends Ellen, Teckhua, and Natsuki. All of us have Asian blood within us. Ellen is Chinese (like I am) but was born in America. I was born in China. Teckhua is Mongolian, and Natsuki is Japanese. We love animals and we share concerns about their habitat loss, hunting problems, and other things that might make these remarkable creatures become extinct. I hope, that after you’ve read this book, you will make better choices of what you do and what you don’t do. Now, in this book, we are sisters, but in real life, we are not. In the story, we are vegetarians, but in real life, we are not. Our parents have different jobs, too. Okay, enough talk now. Sit back and enjoy the book!!

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Chapter 1

The Debate at Dinner


“Girls, time for dinner!” my mom yelled. I groaned and dragged myself to the bathroom. “But you said I could email Uncle Sherbert!!” I whined. “Later!” boomed my dad. “I just got a turkey from the shop!” he yelled. “DAD!!!” this time, it was me and my siblings. Our dad was a butcher but Teckhua, Ellen, Natsuki, and I were all vegetarians. Very fitting, isn’t it? NOT!! “What?” our dad said in an innocent voice. “I just freshly killed it!” Then there was a giggle. “Sorry girls! No turkey today!! Just broccoli, vegetarian pizza, and some lettuce!! Oh, and add carrots, apples, and oranges to that!!” “YOU’RE THE BEST, DAD!!!” Ellen cried. We rushed downstairs and gobbled down the meal.


Then, our mom reached into the microwave and gave us a ham and tuna sandwich sliced into fours. “Here, this is your lunch for tomorrow,” she said. We backed up from the sandwich. “Mom, you know that we don’t eat meat!!” cried Teckhua. “Exactly!” said Natsuki.


And that was how the debate at dinner started. Dad teamed up with mom. Our mom was a waitress at the Meat for Beat store in downtown, Indiana. “Animals are going to go extinct because of you two!!” I pouted. “It’s not entirely us!! Others are doing it too!!” replied mom.

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Chapter 2

The Tornado



Then, there was a loud BOOM!! Our radio popped to life. “Tornado and hurricane approaching Williamsburg on the Lake. Be aware.” Then the radio buzzed and the line was dead. Dad groaned. On the other hand mom was already shouting out orders. “Chelsea, make sure the windows are closed! Ellen, lock the doors! Teckhua, run to the store and buy a supply of everything you can, here’s the money, Natsuki, check the fridge!” Mom was running around like crazy. Suddenly, I stopped right in my tracks. “The zoo!” I gasped. A new zoo had just opened near a local Chinese market that we went to often. Teckhua had went to that store, called Saigon. I ran down the street. Ellen was just about to lock the front door. “Ellen, the zoo!” I panted. “Oh no! Natsuki, quickly, the animals at the zoo need our help!!” Natsuki ran toward us. “Let’s go!!” she declared in a strong voice.Side by side, my sisters and I ran to Saigon to warn our brother. We were just passing the entrance of the Emperial Zoo as Teckhua ran up to us. We

locked eyes. Our brains became one. Without a single word, we raced toward the zoo.

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Chapter 3

Saving the Zoo


We raced inside the gates. We were fast and swift. We discovered a new energy somewhere in us. We ran up to a zookeeper. “How can we help?” demanded Teckhua. The zookeeper looked at us in surprise. I looked at the label on his shirt. ‘John Martinez’ it said. “Please, Mr. Martinez! We really want to help save the animals!” I begged. Slowly, Mr. Martinez nodded his head at us. “OK. Go to the birdhouse. Start with the bald eagles. You’ll need to wear these. After you get them, put them in the cages on the bench.” He tossed some leather gloves at us. We put them on and ran to the birdhouse. We began transporting them, gently, as if they were delicate vases about to break any moment. We were sweating when we were done. The birds of prey had been especially hard. “Very good. Would you young’uns care to work at this zoo?” Mr. Martinez asked. We nodded, too exhausted to say anything. “In that case, call me Jo, ok?” We nodded again. Jo offered us a ride home. “Gladly.” That was Ellen.

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Chapter 4

A Conversation in the Car


“You’ll be payed $50.00 a month working as a beginner at the animal training place, $60.00 a week for working as a full time beginner at the ‘Dangerous Animal Encounter’, and $30.00 a month for beginning a tourist. Is that all right?” Jo asked on the car. “Perfect!” I declared. I was usually shy around strangers. Teckhua looked at me in surprise. I blushed. “Great!” Jo shouted happily. “No, it’s great for US! We’re going to be the richest children in the world!” joked Teckhua. We all smiled. For the rest of the car ride, we had a conversation. It went a little something like this:

Jo: Do you like animals?

I: Do we LIKE animals? We love them!

Everybody ‘cept Jo: That’s perfectly right! Love them more that a piece of cheesecake!

Jo:heheheh

Teckhua: I know! Why don’t we play a game of what we like best in the category of animals? Whoever pauses is out! Last person not paused wins! Bald Eagle!

I: Orca!

Ellen: Arabian Horse!

Natsuki: Rockhopper Penguin!

Jo: Bottlenose Dolphin!

Teckhua: Ummmm…Errrr

I: You’re out! Siamese Dancing Fish!

Ellen: Pilot Whale!

Natsuki: Errrr…..

I: Out! Spotted Ray!

Ellen: Barn Owl!

I: Mourning Dove!

Ellen: Okay, okay, I give up!!

Jo: Here we are! See you tomorrow!! Remember the pass!

[ 本帖最后由 然然 于 2010-10-10 21:45 编辑 ]

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Chapter 5

A Word to Mom


“Great! That’s a perfect idea!” said mum and dad. “So we can go?” I asked hopefully. “Yep!” said Dad. “Right, Maria?” “Yep,” mum said. “Of course!”

“Yipee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

We shouted. Mom grinned. “Well, take a shower and go to bed because you have a busy day ahead of you.” We talked in the shower. “Just think about ho RICH we’re gonna be!” Teckhua said, grinning from ear to ear. “We could be the richest kids in the neighborhood!!” I said excitedly. “Wow!” said Ellen. “Now, now,” Natsuki said briskly, tapping her fingers against the wall. “Don’t you think we’re being a bit overdoing it?” she asked. “Hey! Look at the time on the wall!” I said. “Oh no! We’ve been in here for 2 hours and a ½ talking!” Teckhua exclaimed. “You guys all right in there? It’s 12:50, I thought you were in bed!” our dad shouted through the door. “We’re fine! Just getting out!” we replied. “Okay, if you say so,” said our dad with a worried voice. As soon as we stopped the water, we heard our dad sigh with relief. A few seconds later, we got out of the shower. We had just changed into our pajamas and lay down when mom came down to say good night. She sang a song that was like this:

Good night, wan an,

Hope you sleep well,

Wan an, wan an,

It’s gonna be beautiful now,

Sleep, precious ones, under the stars,

Wan an, wo de xiao bao,

Go into the stars.

It’s half mixed in Chinese.

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Chapter 6

The Zoo


The zoo was an exciting place. Although it wasn’t as popular as before that awful hurricane (only that had hit the zoo, luckily), we still loved it. “Jo!” we panted, as we ran up to the smiling zookeeper. “Thanks for helping out yesterday. The vets came and gave a check on the birds. All of them are all right, thanks to you!” Jo looked like the happiest man in the world. We stood proudly. “Okay, you can start with the ‘Dangerous Animals Encounter.’ No, wait, on 2nd thought, start training animals. Here’s the map!” Jo tossed 4 maps at us. “See ya’ at 12:00 at the lunchroom, 2:30 for tourist guides, and 4:30 for ‘Dangerous Animal Encounters.’ Then be at the entrance/exit at 7:00 and I’II drive you home. Bye for now!” Then Jo raced away to help a group of parents and their kid, which had unfortunately spilled her ice cream cone. “Well, let’s get started!” said Teckhua. “Agreed!” said the rest of us in unision. “Let’s go!” said Teckhua. We raced toward the training place, ready to become RICH.

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Chapter 7

Best Trainers


We found out that training seemed to come naturally to us. Every animal trusted us. There were more animals that we trained then we could count. It was a breathtaking accomplishment after breathtaking accomplishment. We were soon some of the top beginners that were training animals. We were assigned to different stations, but we were able to see each other often anyways by making our schedules about the same. And there wasn’t any walls so, well, it was plentiful easy. I was training the whales, dolphins, and birds of prey. Actually, all of us had a schedule for the birds of preys because of yesterday. Other than the birds of preys, Teckhua had monkeys, chimps, and apes, Ellen had all birds, and Natsuki had swans, cranes, and monkeys. Oh, and I also had the giant panda, though they don’t do much. Anyways, I was training one of my favorite dolphins (ok, I had only met one) named Flora. Her mate, Fauna, was in another pool with a trainer I had befriended. , named Grace. Her friend, Amanda, was working with Ellen. We soon found out that they were our neighbors. Fauna pulled a rope. The net went up. I made Fauna stay in the net. Then, with a sudden burst, Fauna shot out of the net. She did a somersault, her tail touching the ceiling. Grace looked on. “Wow,” she said. “You’re a spectacular trainer!” she said. I blushed. “Thanks.” So with new friends, we started our career at the zoo.

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Chapter 8

Tourist Guides


After our lunch and training jobs, we went to give people guides. Since we didn’t have much experience, we were with some intermediates. It was pretty boring at first, but then it became very exciting. We got yummy snacks for FREE! Isn’t that awesome! So we were chewing on cotton candy as we introduced the people to animals. Even though we didn’t completely know the way around the zoo, we knew a lot about animals. We were at the whales place. “Dolphins are the smallest group of whales. There are a lot of different types of whales. Pilot whales, killer whales, humpback whales, blue whales. This is a killer whale, also known as an orca. Very sharp teeth. They hunt in pods. Even though they are vicious, they will never harm a human. They can be found worldwide.” I finished my part of the speech with a smile. The group applauded. “Ok, Oreo, you can go now.” Ellen patted the orca’s back and tossed a fish at him.

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Chapter 9

A Dangerous Job


Now came our most difficult task: risking our lives for the ‘Dangerous Animal Encounters’ show. Some people have died doing this. But $60.00? We HAD to do this. We gave each other some nervous grins. Then we stepped into the pen of some hungry crocodiles. Snap! Snap! Snap! The crocodiles were waiting. With a “Ye-Hah!” we swung onto the crocodile’s backs. We rode into the swamp. SPLASH! SPLASH! SPLASH! The crowd cheered as we rode the crocodiles around the swamp. Now we were laughing with delight. Then, we made the crocodiles spin into the air. As they splashed down, we got soaked. But it didn’t matter. We were all too happy to care.

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Chapter 10

Mud Cake


It was chaotic when we got home. “LOOK AT YOURSELVES! YOU LOOK LIKE PIECES OF MUD CAKE! TAKE A SHOWER IMMEDIATELY! NO, MAKE THAT 2 SHOWERS! FOR GOODNESS SAKES, TAKE 5 SHOWERS! NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” mom was shrieking at the top of her lungs. Dad had just come home. He looked at us and started shrieking like mom. We took one look and bulleted right into the shower. “WHEW!” said Teckhua. “That was close!” panted Natsuki. “You’ve got that right!” Ellen and I said together. We spent 5 hours in the shower. When we got out, mom was

already in bed. So was dad. “Holy cow! It’s 12:00!” I whispered. We dragged ourselves into bed. In a matter of 5 seconds, we were asleep.

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Chapter 11

Thief!


We had worked for 4 months at the zoo. Then, 1 day, at 2:00, the phone rang. I dragged myself up. “Hello? This is the Chen family. How may I help you?” “Chelsea! I need you and your siblings help! I heard that you have just bought a dog. I need it!” “Jo! Why do you need my dog?” “A very rare animal that cannot be found in the wild nowadays has been stolen! Remember that small horse you used to ride on? It’s been stolen!” “We’ll be right over!” I woke up the others. Scribbling a note to mom and dad, we raced to the zoo with Snowy, our Husky. Soon we were at the zoo. Jo was there, with Grace and Amanda. We raced toward the prewalaski horse place. “Poor Flure,” Amanda said sympathetically. That was the horse’s name. The horse exhibit was empty. I suddenly realized that Grace had a backpack with her. She pulled a small dog from it. “All right, Dober, do your job!” she said. “Go on, Snowy!” I said to the Husky. She immediately lunged forward.

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Chapter 12

Caught!


Both dogs found the trail at the exact same time. We followed them into Baney Forest. They led us to a tent. Jo peeked in. Flure was in it! 2 men were crouched over her. Jo called the police and the police came over. They arrested the two men. I recognized them immediately. “John! Jacob!” They were intermediate tourist guides. Jo frowned. “WHAT IN THE NAME OF JESUS ARE YOU DOING! I THOUGHT I TRUSTED YOU, BUT NOW LOOK! YOU HAVE BETRAYED ME AND THE ZOO! I WANT A FULL EXPLANATION THIS MOMENT! RIGHT NOW! SO?” “Mr.Martinez, calm down. We will ask them at the police station. As for the young ones, they can go home.” Then the police left.


Chapter 13

Famous


The next day, a newspaper came out. My siblings and friends looked at the front in surprise. It said: 6 YOUNG CHILDREN AND 2 DOGS SAVE ALMOST EXTINCT HORSE FROM 2 BETRAYALMEN. And the rest of it went like this:

Chelsea, Ellen, Natsuki, Teckhua, Grace, Amanda, Dober the dog, and Snowy the dog save Flure the horse from being killed by John(44) and Jacob(23). John was arrested but Jacob counted too young to be in jail. But he was fined $99,000,000 which he payed easily because of the endangered animals he has killed and sold. When he reaches age of 30, he will be in jail for 10 years. John was also fined $99,000,000. Their son, Christopher, was given to Grace’s family.


“We’re famous!” gasped Amanda. “Wow,” Grace said dreamily. And Amanda, Ellen, Grace, Natsuki, Teckhua, and I lived happily as the richest and famous children. We never faced hardships again.

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This book is dedicated to my mom.


Chelsea

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三年级就能写这么好了。。。除了英语的写作能力， 文章也很有思想呢。。看到中文拼音的那段很是亲切。。。

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末来的小作家

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中文差了很多,绝对写不出象隔壁那个侄女的文章了,虽然上了中文学校, 平时绝对是优先选择英文的。

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这个协会绝对入不了， 如果要参加协会，将来进入爱护动物协会应该是她的所愿。 她的未来理想一直是做一个动物饲养员，现在稍有变化是做一个兽医

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写得真好！你侄女算同龄人里写作特别好的吗

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[quote]原帖由 homepage 于 2010-10-11 11:41 发表
写得真好！你侄女算同龄人里写作特别好的吗 [/quote
听她妈妈说写作一直算是不错的, 有时候的作文还被四年级的老师拿去做范文。

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认真读完了。用词很生动形象 果然是NATIVE SPEAKER风范

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嗯，三年级学生写的，不容易！

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私刻公章？

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This book begins very well. Starting a book with a dialogue interests the reader getting their attention. This book is very well written and does prove that zoo's are important for those endangered animals that we might never see again.
But in some parts the book is not believable, For example jumping onto the crocodiles so quickly and riding them or being able to do everything so well. Though overall this book is certainly a well-written book. The events are in good order and you have used many descriptive words.

From Patrick's daughter

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这本“书”写的不错，主要特点是使用了很多生动的对话情景。不过“非对话”方式的人物和场景描述稍显欠缺。。。

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谢谢老师指点阿, 你说的作为样本的事情我发邮件问问她。


她5岁多去的美国，现在让她妈妈最头疼的是不很愿意用中文交流，我爸爸妈妈说她都不怎么和他们说话，估计这也是以后我们第一代移民都要面临的纠结。。。
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